I gave up regular running when I lost my job in 2011. It was too...
The Old Barb and the New Barb are different. I am still the same person,...
Poetry helped shape me. It has changed meaning as I have gone through the seasons...
May is doing what everything does in the grieving process, it is morphing and changing...
As we are upon 10 years without Molly, this anniversary hits especially hard. It makes me relive all the days surrounding it, what I was like, what happened, and the connections that I’ve found. In this episode, I go into what has changed over a...
Baylie’s Coma and What Went Wrong with Shawnee (E191)
Baylie’s story is one of a night with friends gone wrong and how a series of choices lead to her death. From the police, to the hospital, to the investigation, to fighting to pull her off life support because she didn’t want that was a...
As I got into an argument with Gracie, it made me dive deeper into a topic that’s not talked about enough: sibling grief. People often focus more on the parent’s and not the child that has just lost the person they spent their formative years...
This week, I sat down with my sister Eleanor who had a very different upbringing than me considering our father was 82 when she was born. She talks about the judgements people have, having to work hard to forge connections in the family, and how she...
Michelle and I sat down to have a conversation on her work with the nervous system, biofeedback, neurofeedback, traumatic responses, and addressing the root of a problem. She takes on work that’s not traditional in a therapist’s office, but is so...
In this episode, I just ask for you to sit with me in grief of losing my child. My thoughts on the birth of all my children, what I love, what I miss, and why dates are so important to people who are grieving. I contemplate Jack’s personality and...
I got to talk with Emily, a former runner of mine who was a highliner, dealt with Lyme Disease, chatted about how the cycle of trauma can continue, and the life that she’s living now. A nomadic one with more freedom to run her own business and take...
In this episode, I talk about my season of guests, how the podcast has changed, and debating what will happen in the future with the podcast. I have some amazing guests lined up who are all in some way connected to me. Key Takeaways: ...
Filing a lawsuit came with its trials and tribulations, but it also came with a check: dead Molly money. It has taken me so much time to process Molly’s death and put together a foundation. I have finally decided it’s time to really make the...
The fitness and health industry thrives on lies upon lies. From saying that you’ll lose 30 pounds in 30 days to saying that weightlifting is dangerous as a woman. So many of these ideas shaped the younger me and I want women to know the truth about...
I’m having a not great week and it got me into the lies I constantly tell myself to feel better. The lies around grief, around my life changing, around my business working, around Kenny, and how I have a functioning life. In this episode, I also...
Is it true or is it just your perspective? People are told lives throughout their childhood and often go on to tell the same lies to their children. It’s a vicious cycle, but everyone sees truth in a different manner based on their life...
This is a new season all about lies: lies we were told, lies we tell, the morality of it all, and how perception can make a large difference between a lie and the truth. In this episode, I dive into the often silly lies that people were told as...
In step twelve, it’s time to pass on my teachings to others to help them in recovery. It is about living AA as a lifestyle, going through the steps again and again, while sharing wisdom and expecting nothing in return. In this episode, I dive into...
Step eleven of AA is not about praying for anything to be fixed, it’s about praying for self knowledge and the qualities we need to execute that knowledge. It’s about perhaps changing the way we pray, how we view God’s will, and just taking the...
Step eight of AA is all about making a list of people I’ve hurt and finding ways to make amends with them. The difficulty is that making amends with people looks different for every person I hurt. This is a process that can take months or years and...
Step nine is all about the act of making amends and a list to go alongside it. It’s made me consider what truth really means, how context plays a part, and how communication can be ruptured if not done correctly. Key Takeaways: ...
Step seven has taught me a lot about putting my ego aside, living in gratitude, and focusing on the good in life instead of all the bad. It has shown me that even if you don’t drink alcohol anymore, you still have to change your mindset, otherwise...
As I take a breather in between steps I realize that I don’t have to worry so much when things don’t go to plan. That I can view my life in gratitude and not an obligation that drags me down. In this episode, I go through everything I’ve learned...
This week I face my past actions, the friends that have stood by me, and the differences in religion. I look at retributive vs restorative justice and which one can help people that are struggling, as well as how my religion doesn’t support...