The Old Barb and the New Barb are different. I am still the same person,...
The circle of life for me is too often coming back, again and again to...
In the additional step of 13 in AA it talks about if God exists, why do bad things still happen and how he has suffered as much as us. I also see how through my suffering I was able to find great support with my angel moms, even though others have...
In step twelve, it’s time to pass on my teachings to others to help them in recovery. It is about living AA as a lifestyle, going through the steps again and again, while sharing wisdom and expecting nothing in return. In this episode, I dive into...
In step ten of AA it’s all about taking a personal inventory and admitting when you’re wrong about things. It is about being aware of your choices, analyzing them, and trying to reconnect with yourself. In this episode, I explore the negative...
Step eight of AA is all about making a list of people I’ve hurt and finding ways to make amends with them. The difficulty is that making amends with people looks different for every person I hurt. This is a process that can take months or years and...
Step nine is all about the act of making amends and a list to go alongside it. It’s made me consider what truth really means, how context plays a part, and how communication can be ruptured if not done correctly. Key Takeaways: ...
In this week's episode, I take a dive into step six: acknowledgement, taking responsibility, surrendering, and letting go of your ego. It made me think of my flaws, how I over apologize, and how I need to let my flaws flow through me. Key...
This episode caused me to look at my moral inventory, what I carry with me, and what I’m learning to let go. It’s made me question my childhood and how that impacts my life today as well as using failure in my life as an excuse not to move forward...
In step two of AA it’s all about opening my heart, mind, and body. It’s a tough journey to accomplish though and it makes me look at points in my life where I made choices I didn’t feel great about, but also choices to forgive others. In this...
To kick off the theme of season 9, I’m talking about Alcoholics Anonymous and my struggle with addiction. I discuss what AA is like, what I learned, how I feel powerless, and how I’m trying to improve my life. Key...
Rewatching The Notebook brought back so many connections to my own life. It made me think about losing Molly, the mistakes I’ve made, how it’s different raising Jack, the choices I’m making for him, and really just being at a turning point in my...
Menopause is seen differently in America versus other cultures. Society here sees it in a negative light, but there is so much more to the story. My own experience with taking estrogen has made my life better and I’ve noticed a huge...
As I had the most frustrating weeks I’ve had in a while, it made me think about my anger. My coping mechanisms, good and bad, as well as the repressed anger and how I’m learning to do better. For both myself and to teach Jack better coping...
As I look back on my childhood, I’m reminded of how my neighborhood has changed and the people around me are dying. I also am deeply thinking about the season of Molly, the choices I’ve made, and how I can honor her. Key...
As Easter is passing it brings back all the memories of Molly. I sat down to watch some movies which just had me in tears and made me think back on all the choices I’ve made in my own life. I really recommend you watch them and see how you relate to...
Jane and Skylar come on this week to talk about their journeys with epilepsy. From being discriminated at work to trying to find supportive relationships it’s been a rollercoaster for them both. In this episode, we go on their journeys of being...
I binged watched Six Feet Under, a show based on a real life family who owned a funeral home and how they went through grief. It was such a moving show that covered divorced, being gay, marriage, birth, and death that I felt a full spectrum of...
This episode is all about cherophobia and how whenever things start to feel good, I feel like I want to flee. It is about an aversion to joy often because of trauma and how when things start to go well, I often can bring stressful people into my...
I recently discovered my old running logs and it was a treasure trove of information on how my life used to be between exercise, old boyfriends, and what my life was like before Molly died. So much of life has changed, and yet, it’s like nothing has...
In this episode, I explore how and why different religions fast and what it says about society. It was fascinating to learn and all of the religions hold common themes. I also debate if fasting is healthy or not. It leaves me with one question: what...
My morning routine will never be full of meditation and yoga. Instead it is currently filled with decluttering my household one bin at a time. This is in an effort to be more of a minimalist and carefully consider why I own the things I do. In this...