Intergenerational trauma is something that has plagued my family and I’m trying to change it, but it feels like a burden to bear. Growing up, having to keep secrets and not having my basic needs met has made me evaluate how that’s impacted my...
I was sexually abused as a child and it still impacts me at almost 60 years old. It took me a long time to be able to tell this story and to look back at the psychological impact that these terrible experiences had on me. It was a confusing time where...
Episode 62: Trauma Showing up in Patterns
Trying to find my way in the workplace was not an easy task for me. Dealing with coworkers and bosses who didn’t like me while trying to manage my life behind the scenes made my head spin. In this episode, I discuss how trauma impacted my...
In the years of ‘86 and ‘87, it was a tumultuous time. I was blessed to go to 4 different countries and get my first teaching job, but I heavily struggled with drugs and alcohol. At the same time, I was in a relationship with a man twice my age...
My senior year was filled with academics - and a little cocaine. As crazy as I partied in college, I also took advantage of my full scholarship to BU and got a masters degree in a year. I grew as a person and became much more of an adult, even when I...
My sophomore year was a fantastic year for me. I finally started staying at BU on the weekends and I had found a group of friends. I broke up with Jay and began a healthy relationship with David which has had a substantial impact on my life. To top it...
The first semester of my freshman year of college was a difficult transition. It was an odd time in between being a teenager and an adult who had to handle things themselves. Learning time management skills, dealing with a coach that pushed me too...
The first semester of my senior year was horrible. I dealt with a subpar cross country coach, argued with my friends, lost several races, my drinking got worse, and I had an abortion. I went into a depression and it was only the second half of my...
I went Into junior year a different person: I wasn’t with science guy anymore, I had a table at lunch, and my running improved. Along with the good there was such chaos though. My drinking problems began and I got into unsafe relationships with...
My sophomore year was full of ups and downs. I went into the year not knowing where to sit at lunch, and unsure of myself. I ended up going to Germany, quitting gymnastics, joining the cheer team, and becoming a track star. As all these amazing things...
The lines are often blurred to me on what’s okay to share and what’s not. When a student came to me sharing that they were in a relationship with a teacher, I shared my own story of how I was in a relationship with my teacher, “science guy”...
In this episode, I reflect on the birthdays I’ve had, my age, and my mortality. Age is a concept that has changed over time for me. I used to think 50 was old, and now I realize I still have so much life to live ahead of me. As I ponder how I will...
When Kenny and I met it was a time of chaos. We were both getting a divorce from our ex partners and trying to juggle the realities of adulthood. Our relationship was built on a solid friendship and I imagined what my life would entail, but that got...
After 11 weeks, I got married - to a narcissist. I didn’t recognize the signs: I was his third wife, younger than him, and he isolated me from family and friends. Marrying him was an impulsive choice accelerated by trauma bonds left unhealed. As I...
Going to my first AA meeting in the 90s was a positive step in recognizing I had an issue with alcohol. Throughout my life I’ve had an on and off relationship with alcohol that has been difficult to manage. As I recount my experiences from 30 years...
In the fall of 1989 I returned to Concord after almost 10 years in Boston. I needed a fresh start: to get sober, to get into a good relationship, to get out of debt, and to start my career as a teacher. In order to achieve all that, I turned down...
As I find out more about the energy within my body I am compelled to better myself through my diet and exercise. While I look inward, I also look at the past to see how the people around me have grown and changed. Processing these emotions has been...
Helicopter parenting has become a buzzword that everybody is talking about and I am one of them. Sort of. I let my baby go to daycare when I never let my older children out of sight with someone I didn’t know, but as the world has changed so have I....
When I was younger, I didn’t imagine my life going like this. Losing Molly, having Jack, letting go of expectations, and having to find closure has had its struggles. As I ponder on how my life is different from what I expected, I also have...
My daily life with Jack is very different than with Gracie and Molly. When Gracie and Molly were young we were paying a mortgage and working full-time. Now I have more freedom to spend time with Jack and travel. In this episode, I dive into my day to...